I’m restless as I work on my vision. There are a lot of moving parts and I’m still not sure where I’m going to land. As I slowly awaken, I can see it clearly yet I’m not sure where. It’s time to let go.
When I started my training to become an Equine Gestaltist™ one of the first classes was on writing a vision. I can see things in my head, and it was requested that we write it out on paper to make it more tangible. That was not as easy.
My first vision was in western Kansas. It included a lodge because it takes at least a day to get here from anywhere. You can fly into Denver and hop on a plane to Hays which is 90 miles east, so you still have a bit of a drive and there are limited connections. Or you can drive from Denver about four hours, and you might arrive before the connecting flight would. You can fly into Garden City about 90 miles south with the same limited connections. And Kansas City is about a five-to-six-hour drive. I knew when I married Mike that I would be staying in western Kansas, so it was a beautiful vision.
Then suddenly in June of 2018, everything changed. He had been diagnosed with several illnesses and it had been a complicated case for the doctors. His esophagus had a stricture, and he couldn’t get food down. He’d had a feeding tube for about one and a half years. Then he had that removed and about one month later was put on IV nutrition. About six months later he was in the hospital for a few days and suddenly he couldn’t breathe. He was put on a ventilator and was being flown to KU Med Center in Kansas City.
I watched for two hours while they stabilized him for the flight. We only made it as far as Hays. I had my last chemotherapy treatment the day before. I still had radiation and our youngest was going to be a senior in high school. I couldn’t stop and think about anything else.
Mike had sold the farm ground and cattle a few years before. All I had left was some pasture and grassland which I rented to one of his cousins. My goal was to work on my business. Gradually my vision started to change to be in eastern Kansas about one hour from Kansas City International airport. I started looking at properties in June 2019. There was one just west of Lawrence that I really liked. I went to see it for the third time on May 29, 2020. The realtor wanted me to make an offer. Then on June 11, my dad died. I told her that was going to delay things. Little did I know how long.
The pandemic put a wrench in everyone’s lives, including mine. It didn’t feel like things changed much but they did. My son who was in his first year at KU came back for Spring Break and didn’t go back. The next year wasn’t very good for him either. He started having seizures and I’ve spent a lot of time traveling back and forth with him and looking for a property.
My mom decided to sell her house in 2021 without a plan as to where she would go. She’s now settled in an independent living apartment that is attached to the hospital.
I sold the land here and now I’ve put an offer on the property in eastern Kansas. If that doesn’t pan out there are at least two other properties that I like. Hopefully, I will know something soon.
Do you have a vision? Does it need some course correction? The horses and I can help you with that. Connect with me here to find out more.
I’m Beginning To See The Light.
Make a Connection in the comments below.
Onward!
